Thursday, September 1, 2011

For Maddie

This post is for Maddie, a baby that was taken too soon.

When I was pregnant with Cash I joined a website called babycenter. It is such a great site to find information on your baby, and meet and talk with other moms, with babies your child's age.
One day I started seeing all these posts about a "Baby Maddie" I opened one up and it led me to her mom's blog. I cried and cried as I read Kellie's words on the screen. She had had every mother's worst fear happen to her.

On February 17th Maddie left this world and went to heaven. She was only a couple weeks older than Cash. I know I didn't know her, but she seemed like such a sweet baby.

Her time in this world has made such an impact on so many people. I know, in my experience, it helped me to appreciate every minute I had with Cash, a little more.

Rest In Peace baby Maddie, and Happy Birthday Kellie.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

People let me tell ya 'bout my best friend

This would be her. My sister Emma.

I am so grateful to have a little sister like Emma. She is selfless, funny, beautiful, helpful, smart, and loving. Wow, that's a lot of adjectives.

She has been there for me in the hardest of hard. She has helped with Cash more than I could ever dream of. She has given me someone to talk to, someone to laugh with, laugh at, and someone to just be my friend.

She just recently turned sixteen. Which is so exciting, but so sad all in the same breath.
I am so excited for her to be growing up and getting to do all the fun things teenagers do. She will be starting school tomorrow, getting her licence, going on dates, all fun things. But I can't help but be sad. Will she get so wrapped up in the whirlwind that is high school, and forget about me? Will she get tired of hanging out with her lame, older sister and nephew at home? Will she get a boyfriend and devote all her time to him?

These things scare me, but I know they are a part of life. I now know how heartbroken my parents must have felt through my teenage years. I just hope she will be smart and learn from my mistakes, and go on to do something that she can take pride in.

Sister, I love you, and I thank you for all you do for me. You are the best sister and Auntie anyone could ask for. 

Branson, Missouri Wax Museum

Sister looking all cute before prom

Fourth of July Parade

This night Cash would not sleep and not calm down for anyone. Auntie Em held him, and he fell asleep on her shoulder. Cash adores Auntie Em.

Monday, August 22, 2011

Going back in time- Sprinkler fun.

As you all know, this summer has been HOT, way too hot for an apartment with a crappy little swamp cooler. Which is not good, when said apartment is home to a baby, who gets grouchy when it's too hot.
So this summer we spent a lot of time at our parent's houses who have central air haha. This specific day we decided we couldn't handle the 100 degree weather any longer, and went over to Cash's Mamaw's to play in the sprinkler.

The lovely Miss Hailey

Hmm.. Looks fun.

 I'm going in...

Get me out! Get me out!

Haileybug got bored so she played in the sandbox.

And we ended it all with some cuddling,

And watermelon. :)

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Best of May

First Mother's Day

Helping Daddy play Xbox.

My water baby!

Baby stop in Heber on the way to Salt Lake to feed, change, entertain, etc.

The only way I can get him to sit still to take pictures with me... with food!

Those eyes...

Our day at This is the Place Monument

My boys!

Helping Momma with laundry 

The cutest boy ever!

Going back in time- Cash the Biker

Hi, all! It has been an embarrassing amount of time since I wrote a post. I blame it on my stupid camera cord. I never did find it, but came up with an easy should-have-done-it-months-ago way of uploading photos.

Anyway, I thought I would take you all for a trip back in time to see some of my favorite moments these last four months. Hop into the delorean and I'll take you back to May.

Cash just loves being outside. He loves being outside with his Daddy even more.

Here are a few pictures of Nate's two babies.

Monday, June 6, 2011

Cash in NICU (Continued from Cash's Birth Story Pt. 2)

Sunday afternoon I was released from the hospital. I quickly packed a bag and my parents, grandparents, sister, and I were on our way to go see my baby boy. It was the most painful and looooong drive ever! It didn't matter though, because I was dying to see my son.

We got there about nine at night. Somebody found a wheel chair for me and I was wheeled up to the second floor. It seemed like forever until I got through the maize leading to NICU. Past the big wooden doors was the front desk, lockers, and washing station. I got out of the wheel chair, washed all the way up to my elbows with the little scratchy sponge, and into room one I hobbled.

Cash was the baby farthest from the door. All the babies I passed were so tiny! One pound, one and a half pounds, "he doesn't belong here!" I thought. I finally made it to my sweet boy.

I stayed as long as I could but the day had been hard on me. I couldn't walk without being hunched over, and I barely made it a couple feet at that. Sad to leave my boy, we went to the Ronald Mcdonald House. If anyone is looking for a legit charity to donate to this is the place. I am so thankful for the RMH. It gave us an affordable place to stay, meals to eat, and other people who were in our yucky shoes.

The days went on and they all became a blur. It took all the energy I had to get up out of bed, get dressed, go downstairs to eat, and go back to the hospital. I can not remember details day to day but I do know it was a roller coaster of ups and downs.

A couple days after arriving in SLC we learned what made our tiny boy so sick. He was group b strep positive, which attacked all his systems. Group B Strep is unpreventable and just naturally occurs in some pregnant women. At 35 weeks pregnant you get a test and if you are positive you get antibiotics to treat it before the baby comes. We weren't so lucky. I had a false negative so we had no clue the nasty GBS was going to attack Cash. The GBS caused Cash to have Pneumonia and Pulmonary Hypertension. In real speak, he was having a hard time.

Cash had to have many tests. He had an x-ray every morning, a spinal tap to check for meningitis (Negative), a blood transfusion, tubes taken in and out, and much more.

This was what we called the "baby straight jacket" it kept him from pulling on his wires, tubes, IVs, etc

Cash pulling on his ventilator

 Throughout the days there Cashy had many visitors

And Mommy and Daddy were there as much as possible

After almost two weeks Cash was doing well enough to move in to a big crib. This was BIG, happy, news. Moving to a big crib and maintaining body heat are one of the many steps a NICU baby has to take to go home.

And we finally got to hold him again!!! Best.feeling.ever.